Sandy

We had dinner with our two closest friends here, Sharon and Sandy. The ribs we had at Adelita's were great! The sauce was excellent and it was half-price night, only 65 pesos or about 4.82 US for a full rack of ribs. Sandy has a malignant 11 cm tumor on her liver, as disclosed by her recent PET scan. Her chemo doc is keeping her on her drug plan for now, which just started Saturday.

Sandy was quiet and reserved tonight. She just told us tonight during dinner. I don't know what we said. In retrospect I think that we under-reacted. Actually, I'm sure that we really didn't know what to say. Still don't. I'm sure that Sandy was keeping it together tonight. I'm numb. Sandy's not touchy-feely, I am. I really don't know how to feel about this at the moment. I want to say that I feel rage, but I don't. I guess I feel a huge disappointment of some kind. Just when I thought she'd had enough, she gets shit on again. Don't anyone tell me this is God's plan or that he/she/it moves in mysterious ways or that God loves her bull shit.

I'll muddle my way through this as I always do when I'm at a loss for words or understanding. I will be as  good and supportive a friend as I can be...